things we forget are normal in our twenties
brutal honesty from someone in their mid-twenties
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“He genuinely believes the peak of his life was when he was in his early twenties and he doesn’t understand that he has the power to make the best moment of his life the moment he’s living in.” - Dolly Alderton
Opening note
I’ve been feeling so much love from my recent posts about deinfluencing and navigating my twenties—thank you! As an eldest daughter and only child, I’ve always wished I had an older sibling to turn to for advice. Since I didn’t, I’ve had to figure things out on my own, and I know I’m not alone in that.
So, in today’s newsletter, I’m sharing a list of gentle reminders—things I often forget are completely normal in your twenties.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the highlight reels we see online, but they’re just that—a curated glimpse, not the full picture. If you ever find yourself comparing your journey to someone else’s, I hope this serves as a little reassurance.
If anything resonates with you or you’d like to add your own thoughts, I’d love to hear from you in the comments. Hopefully, this can be a source of comfort for anyone feeling a little lost in their twenties (or thirties).
Things we forget are normal in our twenties
Feeling ‘stuck’ in jobs, degrees, or relationships that are not right for us.
Spending weekdays or weekends alone because you don’t have a huge friend network.
Not knowing what we’re doing in life.
Constantly question our decisions about our career or life in general.
Facing the pressure of financial and emotional independence for the first time.
Not being product 24/7.
Having a small circle of friends.
Letting ourselves rest without guilt.
Not travelling every year - because in this economy, it’s tough, and not everyone has the money for it, or others prefer to invest their money elsewhere - and that’s perfectly okay!
Having bare nails is normal; constantly having fresh nails, lashes, or facials isn’t.
Having your parents pay for everything is not normal.
Looking back and realising how far you’ve come, your ‘normal’ changes fast.
Letting go of friendships. It doesn’t have to be a huge falling out. Sometimes, you simply grow apart, which is completely okay.
Be single.
Not having a full-time job in your study area. Or should I say get a full-time job? The job market is an absolute crap in this economy.
Changing career paths is completely normal. I’ve gone from working in teaching to marketing.
Not having everything figured out.
Not having a 5 or 10-year plan (or even a clue about what we want).
Choosing to be sober is normal, and no, it’s not boring. I simply do not want to spend money on alcohol, and I prefer not getting drunk.
Saving no to plans or people just to be alone.
Still living with your parents - trust me it’s more common than you think. I know lots of my friends in their twenties and thirties who have moved back in with their parents because they cannot afford to move out on their own.
Not having a clean house or apartment 24/7.
Outfit repeating! It’s normal to rewear clothes.
Spending time alone simply because you enjoy it.
Not eating out often. No, you don’t need to be grabbing a coffee or a pastry at a cafe every few days. It’s honestly not a sustainable financial habit, and I prefer saving that money elsewhere. But if you enjoy it and can afford it, then go for it!
Enjoying the simple things in life, like your favourite comfort films.
Dealing with setbacks. Life isn’t a linear journey; it’s a full-on rollercoaster with ups and downs.
Feeling confused and lost about the future. It’s okay to change your mind. Make mistakes. As long as you learn from it and keep moving forward.
Spending the weekend or weekdays alone.
Trying new hobbies. You shouldn’t be afraid of trying new things. If I’ve learned anything, it's that your twenties are a second chance at your childhood.
Having less productive days. Sometimes, you just want to rot in bed, and that’s okay. You don’t always have to be switched on all the time.
Feeling like you’re not doing enough - so don’t compare yourself to what you see online.
Having a full-time job while pursuing a passion project.
Being frustrated that your progress in a project or career is taking longer than expected.
Experiencing imposter syndrome in your career or life in general. If I’m being honest, that feeling never goes away. I’ve switched jobs a few times, and I still have that voice inside my head that always tells me that I’m not good enough or simply that I’m a fake. Guess what? Everybody is going through the same thing. No one truly knows what they’re doing in life. So just fake it till you make it.
Take time to build your skills.
Feel free to share your thoughts or advice about navigating your twenties. I’m hoping this space will help others who are feeling lost in their twenties or about to enter this decade.
Twenties Mood Board
If I had to summarise my twenties in a collection of photos, it would be this collection of photos and series of words.
Early twenties - experimentation, innocence and wonder
Mid-twenties - more reserved, open-minded, burnt-out
Late twenties - to be confirmed upon a later date. For now, I’ll just insert this here.
Things I’ve Been Loving Recently
At-home pilates – I’ve never felt at ease in a gym, so I prefer working out alone, either at home or around my neighborhood. Since I’m doing a low-buy year, at-home workouts have been a great way to stay active while saving money.
Portable printer – I never realised how useful an inkless portable printer could be until I received one as a gift. Now that I’m back into journaling, I’ve been using it to print photos and stickers—it’s both fun and much cheaper than traditional printing or buying stickers outright.
Early morning walks – A peaceful way to start the day before work.
Rewatching childhood comfort films – My go-tos are usually Studio Ghibli or Disney, but The Parent Trap and Howl’s Moving Castle are definite favourites.
Chamomile tea before bed – This is a small ritual that helps me wind down.
Reducing screen time – I avoid my phone for an hour before bed and an hour after waking up, and it’s made a huge difference in my sleep and productivity. If you struggle with doom scrolling, I highly recommend trying Opal—it helps manage screen time for specific apps.
Journalling every single day - I started journalling this year as a way to document what I do every day but also organise my thoughts. I cannot stress how cathartic it is, and I’ve found I’m more likely to pick up my journal than feel the urge to scroll on my phone.
I listen to jazz music while I’m reading and working. - This playlist on Spotify has been on repeat for the past few weeks, and I think it might be in my Spotify wrap-up for this year.
In case you missed out…
Here are a few of my most popular posts from the past few weeks that you:
Media I consumed instead of doom-scrolling
What to read
What to watch
What to listen
Don’t forget, if you’d like to ask me a question, you can submit your questions anonymously below. It can be about anything (career, living abroad, travelling, navigating your twenties, etc).
Here’s my mood this week:
That's it for now, but you'll be hearing from me soon!
Until next time,
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resources I can’t live without
You walk a path all yours, unhurried and true, and in its gentle flow, happiness blooms marking you as someone wonderfully rare…. Embrace your differences/uniqueness as you grow